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Been Nowhere, Done Nothing

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Been Nowhere, Done Nothing

By: Paul Glazebrook
Narrated by: Paul Glazebrook
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BEEN NOWHERE, DONE NOTHING The brutally honest, laugh-out-loud, and unexpectedly moving true story of life as a British infantry soldier.

Paul "Glazey" Glazebrook didn't set out to write a war memoir. He set out to tell the truth — about growing up on a council estate, about army selection, about the mates who became brothers, and about the chaos, humour, and horror of operational tours from South Armagh to Iraq.

What he wrote instead became one of the most talked-about military memoirs in years — a book civilians read in one sitting and veterans pass between each other like a regimental in-joke.

There's no glorification here. No deep political reflection. Just the real, raw, occasionally filthy truth of what it's actually like to serve — told with the kind of dark, self-deprecating humour that gets soldiers through anything.

Rated 4.9 stars on Amazon and 4.8 stars on Audible, where Paul narrates the audiobook himself.

Whether you served or you've never worn a uniform in your life — this is the British Army as you've never heard it before.

©2025 Paul Glazebrook (P)2025 Paul Glazebrook Military & War Funny Witty Thought-Provoking
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Critic reviews

‘A brutally honest and hilarious account of soldiering from a Rifleman’s perspective’ —Andy McNab CBE, DCM, MM
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I have never served in the armed forces so love to hear the stories of those that have. This book kept me enthralled from beginning to end. Well worth a listen.

Gripping

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Paul’s book is a heartfelt, funny, and truly relatable look at his experiences during his service in the Royal Green Jackets. His stories capture not just the day-to-day humour and chaos, but also the deep camaraderie and shared experiences that stay with you for life. Listening to it, was like catching up with an old friend and it was at times an emotional roller coaster — honest, reflective, and full of character.
A brilliant read that perfectly captures what service life is really all about.
Cheers Glazey and to the Chosen Men that made the ultimate sacrifice until we meet again!

Honest, Raw and Funny -A nostalgic trip down memory lane

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Was engaged from start to finish. I found this a fascinating and funny window into the world of the British squaddie. A humble laugh-out-loud account that also packs an honest emotional punch. So glad he narrated it himself. I could’ve listened to hours more. Highly recommend!

Humour, honesty, and heart!

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I enjoyed reading this as much as I did writing it. Thank you for all your kind reviews folks

Great story by an excellent author

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All I will say is top bloke for a Green Jacket!
Well done mate, now get the spoons out the sink! K***y must of taught you everything you know! Out!!!

The reflection of my early years in the RE.

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